I had released a podcast on manifestation that day, and I was feeling pretty excellent. I had recorded the intro earlier in the day stating that exact fact, and I was embracing this feeling. I was full of knowing. I knew that nothing could destroy my vibe. I was strong, I was powerful. I was a force! I could accomplish anything! I could rock life, even bigger!
That feeling lasted all of three hours. Isn’t it just like life to challenge us, right in the moment when we are feeling unstoppable?
Here I was, embracing this soaringly lovely feeling, knowing that I was manifesting, like, everything, and I need not worry. I had a date with my daughter that afternoon to go to a spin class with lots of other little girls to celebrate their fifth grade graduation. We went and I was enjoying the class, and feeling physically empowered, too. I was all smiles as I sweated.
And then it happened. Toward the end of class, the instructor played a song from my old band and talked about how wonderful they were and shared the message of the song. Suddenly, I was somewhere I didn’t want to be. Yet I couldn’t get up and leave. I was forced to listen to and exercise to this song that was- and still is- a rather painful reminder to me. It’s a source of feeling ‘less than.’ It makes me compare and it makes me revisit old hurts and pains. And the biggest irony of all is that it’s meant to be a highly inspirational and uplifting song.
I put my head down and I turned the pedals over, and I tried to muster the feelings I had breezily taken for granted only minutes before. I felt blindsided and stuck. Up came all the old- the old that I have worked so hard to rid myself of. I wanted to get the hell out of there, to turn it off, to make it go away. But I couldn’t. I had to listen (and it was loud, of course; those spin classes are crazy loud). I felt all the old emotions come popping up: hurt, anger, sadness, grief. And all I could think in that moment was ugh, why?
It took the wind out of my sails. But when I got home, I got to thinking. That song, right then, wasn’t at all about the song. It was about me. It was about learning that something can come out of nowhere, when you least expect it, and it can rock you- and not in a good way. It can throw you off-balance and leave you reeling. Life, the universe, or whatever you want to call it looked me right in the eye and said, “Oh, you think you’re Miss Strong and Powerful? You’re such a force? Prove it.”
I had to step up right then and overcome the challenge in a new way. The great thing about life and mental strength is that they aren’t all-or-nothing. If you falter when you are working to believe, when you are working to maintain your “bigness,” there are going to be times that it doesn’t work, and that’s ok. It took me a little while to get that feeling again, and it was challenging, for sure. And I am braced for the next time. I know I’ll get through it if it happens again. But of course, most likely, it’ll be something entirely new next time, something I never saw coming.
Whether it’s an ex, an old boss, an old band, a job you didn’t get, a friend who insults you, or whatever, we all get blindsided occasionally, just like I did. Remember that you can get your groove back and regain that stride, recapture that bigness, and spread your wings even further than the last time.
5 GO-TO’s WHEN YOU’RE BLINDSIDED
- Remember that this too shall pass. It’s a cliché because it’s true. Hang in there.
- Keep turning the pedals over and moving forward. Retreat or stopping isn’t an option.
- Focus on the YOU picture. Make it about you: what are you supposed to be learning from this experience?
- Ask yourself: what did this bring up that I need to work on? Write those down. For instance, I still have work to do to summon love in those moments when it’s easier to revisit anger or indignation or a host of other unpleasant emotions.
- Regain your balance through focus. In yoga, you focus on a point to strengthen your balance. So find a point of strength, be it a mantra (how’s this for a ridiculous one) or an internal picture or whatever floats your boat, and force yourself to focus on it. Even if you don’t know what you’re doing, keep trying, and you’ll develop those muscles and find them more quickly next time.
Just like JLo in this picture, rock your “ride” and overcome any blindside-esque obstacles that pop up. It’s your ride, after all!
PS… Follow @realamyedwards on Instagram for more!